Seeing into Time

Bowzer was blasting away a

Saturday night-

and the wood stove kept

a peculiar smell

a certain chemical

I can feel it in my nose

right now

after 34 years.

My dad sang

“goodnight sweetheart”

and the day melted away

in deep sounds

rumbling through his chest.

I was held

and faded up the staired hallway

(past the place where Gramma Brown

had hinted at chains and ghosts)

by the old wire spool table,

landing softly

my wood post bed

where I had earlier

sawed off a bed post

and placed a puppet over the void

still undiscovered.

a long term plan

if I’ve ever had one.

Ping!: Ping!


valley of the spark

when the heat is so hot

you can’t buy a breath

and the death is so near

you always knew this death.

just hours prior

in the shade, you shivered

and that heavy bottle’s

cool couldn’t be protected.

look, across the valley

goblins and walking wind

drying up the weather

they get nothing of what you spend.

near the town made for a river

here, sage and dust

take caution where you step

lest you disturb the bio-crust.

it’s me or that religion

I won’t ask you to choose

it’s me and that religion

later on, we’ll each lose.

I pulled down the brim

I stared at the distant wall

distracting the horizon

over where cavemen fall.

my frame has no reference

the pictures fill the wall

my physics all exploded

ruminating an endless hall.

I sit and stitch together

Bob advises I move on

acceptance sounds appealing

Past still holding strong.

I can see the writing

I can feel the breeze

love ask me for love

I fold up at the knees

a friend could lend an ear

it’d be cheaper over beer

this town is feeling small

nothing left ’round here.

certificate of participation

Mary tried to warn me

she knows all about choice

she pleads with me for wisdom

but she can’t hear this voice

and the images and the dreams

the way they each fall down

and wait below my feet

she’s already back in town.

Back when we had watches

buried in the mist

when the rain was there to float in

when a fern was a place to kiss

back when our moments

were free to come and go

sure it was something special

but now, we know, we know.

after midnight the bridge is lowered

as the storm waters fall in rocks

she asks me to hold her

as we place an order in the box

and we share our long staring

how strange it does seem

that we take in all this visage

just to escape from our dreams.

I wrote it down to tell it.

alligators sparred with snakes

my brother took the credit

he does that before he shakes

and the fur is shaken upward

pleading to go outside

I’m the man of the house

you get back to sleep, it’s alright.

forever I felt depression

my memory tries to fool

reminds me of the time

I was smiling in a pool

but the chemicals are overridden

for the fear of exposure to

a walk outside of this prison

with my reactionary crew.

once upon a time the sun was blinding

the breath was deep and clean

the eyes could see forever

the skin was soft and felt everything

this room has turned all musty

the studs closing in

though- I knew from the beginning

you don’t come ’round here to win.

earlier was morning

Morning whispers in my eyes

telling me everything

tells me here

I never seen

it’s all so clear

but this

I won’t know this

for years

I’m strapping

strong and free

I know they can’t

touch me

not in this morning hour

I’m free

from the weight of power

tell me NOW!

and say it plain

won’t you?

please explain.

how truth

cannot remain

the same.


It was all darkness and toddler

beating me from my sleep

with crashes and splashes and bumps

and the sweetest kisses too

that’s a major advantage over before woken by a dog

with her sharp scratches and drenching tongue

it was still dark

I couldn’t see a thing

I had to pee

I wriggled my way out from under the soon-to-be-4-year-old

he kissed me and told me he loved me

I saw it was 7 already

again- I sighed

and made my way back to the couch

where he was giggling

at some historic antic

now lost forever

“are you making jokes?”

yes, daddy

epitome of chipper

and joy

I can recognize that in him

and his sister

like I can see the ocean’s waves

from the chalky sand of the beach

I can notice the salt smell

only because it is not home

when we return

the house always has a smell,

when we are gone

the smiles haunt us

and sometimes we cannot envision the things most dear

we miss them

I can’t tell you what my home smells like

or my car

or me

I can barely notice my mood

until it is held to the light or the fire

of discontent, or craving

but not this toddler

he is at home


in joy, in laughing and singing

in concentration

in frustration and anger and loudness

in sleep in dreaming

it is all that there is

and I hope my love is the current

giving him buoyancy

like his does for me

Knuckles and Wrinkles

You wish me the best

Wishes don’t grow on trees,

hold me, and touch me how

I never ask you to.

I see everything through silence

And feel when you stumble

There are passages

(Check the debris

It’s not hiding)

I am

And you’ll fail

I’ve decided

To shift expectations.

Wish me the best

“Take care”, you say.

You turn into an old hag

The kind under a Buick

Knuckles and wrinkles

A lifetime ago and getting fatter

I’ve not gone anywhere

But around the world

landed south of the flatlands

west of the Atlantic

too many seat cushions

and pairs of boots

I know myself well

Unless we examine worth

I’m a bargain

If you have a strong back

And love plastic

And are quick with a rope,

A kind hand

A low horizon

White Porch

You, you look into my eyes

you, you say, I love you

I, I can’t say- I can’t say nothing

but I, I have so much to say.

Oh, oh, just come on in here

oh, the things you’d see

babe, you might go running

can I trust you with me?

you know, you know it’s no question

and I know, I know all about you

but me, that’s the question

I’d hate to, I hate to give this to you.

when I saw you, you were the only

when I saw you, I was the lucky

when I was lucky, I hoped you weren’t leavin’

and now, I can’t believe in- anything.

so babe, come back here to me

my arms are closed too long

and my heart, it is a-talkin’

you need to be closer to hear its faint voice

I an’t going nowhere, and I’m long coming

and I’ll be here, for your kind smile

please, know, this is no game

I just like it, to be quiet this way.

Alligator Hitchikes

Alligator hitchhikes
sleeps out in the rain
someone got pulled over again
and I’m not detained

movin’ from the sunset
to the sunrise, all the same
it’s easy to be right
you just give away the blame

restless in a high place?
No, I’m busy doing nothing.
neglect the essential
pride keeps us safe.

impulsive incarnation
stuffed down by force
belie sincerity
ingenuous without remorse

vibrations rattle under
between wake and sleep
my aura is fading
everything’s looking bleak

restless in a high place?
No, I’m busy doing nothing.
neglect the essential
pride keeps us safe.

help is on the way
a beaten down old car
a cop light on top
insecurity is driving the law

unwashed off putting
unshaven lost his smile
alligator is speaking
we’ll talk with him awhile

restless in a high place?
No, I’m busy doing nothing.
neglect the essential
pride keeps us safe.

autonomy is stifled
the moon is shelter held
license without liberty
wanton, kismet… won’t meld

seven deaths, to chakras
suffocated where I breathe
molded against my nature
outwardly, deceive

restless in a high place?
No, I’m busy doing nothing.
neglect the essential
pride keeps us safe.

Alligator hitchhikes
sleeps out in the rain
someone got pulled over
not me, I’m not detained

fatherly advice

92 miles an hour

ain’t no home for flowers

the rock and roll

spills child’s soul.

“there’s no fear we have more

and look, we have this war.”

it’s no practice- “it’s not law”

it’s ok, “we all have flaws,

come here junior”

take’r hand

“look this way toward never land”

rain man comes

the rain man comes with his magic wand

asks Ramona, “are we having fun?”

‘Mona jumps up on the shelf

it falls down and she hurts herself

oh, oooh- oh!

down the block there stands a dog

sunshine shining through the smog

traffic stops horns have honk

bum limps in a donated smock


Truck driver turns his brain off quick

wheels keep rolling by a kid

rock star swerves spills his drink

daylight gone, night on the rink

woah- oh-OOOOh oh!

‘Mona and her lookin’ glass

sees it all and sees it fast

Rain Man is in his disguise

wonderin’ when a man gets wise

oh- oh- oh- oh

we ain’t goin’ nowhere, mama

we never been before this comin’

it’s all lookin’ different, honey

we can’t come back, it’s now only

oh? oh. ooooh oh!

black top slick, light is caught

boots so heavy, start the rot

sounds like ‘drip’, ‘slop’, ‘plop’

something here in the dark

ooooh- ohhhh, woah!

flowers grow, snow will freeze

touch my face, block the breeze

here’s my coat, wrap it up

at least we have a couple crops

oh. oh. oh. oh.